What is Personality and How to Go Beyond it?

What is Personality and How can we go Beyond it?

Dialog with Betsy & BeiYin

BeiYin: What is personality? Is personality an illusion?

Betsy: personality is due to the organization of the current human brain/body, so it produces an inside reflected view or inner sensing of all that we encounter through our senses. We say its illusion because we come to find out that what is reflected inside, we identify with as ourselves, as 'me' and eventually come to find out that this reflection is not us, but rather due to internal mirroring neurons, or sensing capabilities of the brain. At this moment, then this structure of organization of our brains, has served its purpose, to encounter our true essence or the creator of the reflected image. At this point of self-knowledge then can come the breaking down and reorganization of this structure in the brain's nervous system - to eliminate the reflecting organization of the brain, but this rewiring only happens by a process of non-doing, with needs no intention by you, this non-doing is time spent in the state of meditation. The doing is done by making avail of the energy you were holding in 'static form of personality' (conditioned aspects) and transforming it into a new structure, which results in a healing or metamorphosis or reorganization of the mirror into direct sensing and response.

BeiYin: The tendency to survive is inbuilt for all animals. In humans, we see this instinct morphing in complexity, as one uses one’s mind to conjure up infinitely varied ways to defend one’s system.

Betsy: yes, the problem being humans are identified with the nervous system structure itself, which holds patterns of using energy in certain ways, with the old habit to try to survive and keep oneself intact. Thus one holds energy in certain forms, mostly due to beliefs, and finds other ways to do the same when old ways no longer work. The only way out of this game is to spend time in non-doing (deep meditation) with no concept. You will know if it's working, if you are doing non-doing right, if you are healing/changing in profound ways, which can't be pretended or imagined.

BeiYin: 'Personality' starts when consciousness is developed enough that the individual is self aware and this probably starts with the development of senses and their reflection caused by reactions of the system, then realized as body sensations, emotions and thoughts. In this phase there exists no observer separated from the observed, the consciousness exists only through reactions within the system and - there is a total identification with these reactions. Reactions are felt as "I" and out of this the individual gains one's feeling of existence, being limited to body sensations, emotions and thoughts - forming one's 'personality'.

Betsy: Good description of how it comes about. I would add that how one feels oneself as "I" is appropriate for that person’s state of evolution. So one feels as me whether one is identified with one's reflection of not, one is always 'me' having a journey and each day one is different - so that's the constant factor. What is missing here is that one's body organization limits what what can receive. So when one is sick, then one notices one's awareness is reduced and might then trip on a wire around a pallet. The lower one's awareness the less one can receive, and the harder it is to be meditative. The idea that one can access being while in body without being limited by the health of energy flows going through is false. One’s body reflects one's realization, as it is with all forms, energy=matter and matter= energy. People think they can miraculously heal without having to go through pain as the tissues change and to do something to get it done, that isuntil they actually go through the healing process, and then realize that body is part of their reality.

BeiYin: Being aware of one's existence is the beginning of consciousness in a 'higher life form', but of course this doesn't mean that evolution ends here. It is a beginning, although still primitive, like we are observing on planet Earth, where very few humans are capable to go beyond this basic step.

Betsy: Being aware of one's existence is probably the biggest trap that keeps humans from taking further steps in evolution. They think they've arrived, and there is nothing more to do. Many people have taken this basic step, but not too many go further that it. There are levels to one's ability to be aware in daily life. So one decides to be aware in a moment where one feels awareness is more necessary or prudent to do. Then one starts to meditate. The longer one stays like this' just being aware', and then one's bodily vibration rises. As long as one can hold like this, then the vibration will keep accelerating. The higher the vibration, the more one can see/receive and the more spontaneous/intuitive one can respond to whatever one needs to. Because one can do this at will, then one feels that one is aware, and why one gets confirmation and also why one doesn't feel a need to do more. Yet what one doesn’t know is that there are levels above one's current capability.

BeiYin: planet Earth is still in it's beginning of evolution of consciousness, there is no doubt when one looks at the reality of humanity: War, fighting all over the planet, growing of systems by swallowing others, many millions of humans are starving and suffering not even having the minimum means to survive, while others live in abundance on the costs of others. Then there are millions with 'incurable' diseases, because the established systems are purely materialistic, representing the still primitive state of consciousness. To say it clearly: 'Personality' is NOT something bad or negative, it is a step in evolution, although it seems that humanity is stuck on this step and has difficulties to progress, what could have as a result that humanity is destroying itself - many signs point to this.

Betsy: it all depends on how you want to look at it, is the cup 1/2 full or 1/2 empty? As an old form breaks down, then it starts to crack and weaken and one can see this as what's happening all over the planet from all sides, of environment, weather, people, resources, etc. I think the majority of people have big egos today, having accumulated enough energy in form through experiences. So saying, they are rigid and full of energy in static form which is what makes a big ego, thus they have sufficient energy 'stored' to fuel the transformation into being or wellness and the possibility that it is released in parts comes more near the worse it gets physically outside. So I see all as well, a part of nature and to be expected.

BeiYin: But as all systems have the inbuilt urge to survive, the same with the systems on a more complex level, so the planet Earth might defend itself, supported by the next higher system the 'Sun'.

Betsy: you are right the earth will react, but also I see it not so distinct. What I see are periods of repeating growing cycles on earth, as can be seen from evidence of previous ice ages. So when reaching the end of a cycle, then there is the highest evolutionary form, which is stressed to transform, which is human. The sun also as it ages is increasing it's frequency or pulse over time, so all forms are being subject to higher vibrations, which also serve to shake us up more and make us sick. We either go with the flow or resist, so the choice is ours in the end.

BeiYin: What happens when the human system gets stuck on the step of having build up one's 'personality' - even up to a highly sophisticated state?

Betsy: when one is stuck, then one won't survive, one will get sicker, until one is forced to look at it and recognize the reality, that one is not transforming, but rather holding onto keeping oneself as one sees oneself. There’s not much you can do about somebody being stuck in high sophistication, just let nature take it's course. When they get sick enough, then that's the opportunity for them to take a closer look, if they can't do that then they will have to wait to the next lifetime and have another round of experiences. All is good.

BeiYin: Then the inbuilt tendency shows up and this is the longing and urge to overcome limitations and boundaries. If this need in one's growing process is suppressed by the other tendency of the system to hold oneself together, then the stuck system is cracked up by happenings from the outside and/or from the inside like disease on one or more levels: Body, emotions and mind. If these are treated with chemicals, then there can't be any 'healing' (which is a natural part of the evolutionary growing process), but by treating only the material aspects the system stays stuck and can only be 'cracked' by its death.

Betsy: right, I think I said that above in other words. I see the disease itself as part of the healing process, so all treatments that we try to do to 'heal ourselves' interfere with the higher wisdom of the bodies way to heal itself. To distinguish states in body of health versus being sick is hard to define, I see all as one process. Sickness / symptoms are signs of healing and should not be interfered with. So to not interfere is as simple as being meditative as much as possible, trusting this is enough and allowing one's healer 'time' to do what is necessary. Yet, simply doing a non-doing for humans to heal themselves is nearly an impossible request. If they've advanced far enough then they want to take credit for having healed themselves, and do all kinds of treatments, supplements, exercises, etc. then when they get a result, they say: I did it, all is vanity for humans. Probably all the treatments were unnecessary, just for confirmation, and the actual healing if it happened was due to having spent enough time spend in meditation, nothing more. Okay, all treatments if better than one's normal operating state will rise one's energy, so they can all help 'our healer' do it's job. But the most effective way to rise one's energy is simply to do effective meditation

BeiYin: In one's individual growing process there might come the moment when the 'personality' has grown to such an extent that all gained and collected properties don’t give satisfaction anymore. After turning around oneself again and again, the question might arise, what is the sense of all this? Also it might happen, that wishes and desires are not being fulfilled because of daily reality and then frustration is accumulating up to the moment when emotional reactions are causing disease: Depression, stress and distortion.

Betsy: then one realizes that one is doing all these things, and one still feels lousy, one is not getting better doing things in the way one is used to doing them. At that moment one simply gives up trying and when one does, one goes quiet, and it is s just this 'surrender' that starts or restarts the healing process. For example, cancer can be a wake up call, to ‘give up’; when one's physical life is truly threatened.

BeiYin: The strong 'personality' is shattered and comes near to collapse. But as there were many different concepts integrated in one’s personality, so also those of 'spirituality' with images of worlds beyond daily reality. This will be the moment when the individual needs those concepts to survive and it might serve and help for some more time.

Betsy: Energy held in form as personality is very complex and has many layers built up over many lifetimes. One can't release it all at once, it is released bit by bit, and each time a bit is released it's converted into a small part of new nervous system. Thus it's a biological process and happens as metamorphosis' the old energy taken from previously being held in form, being used to build the new form. Releasing of personality also echoes the healing process, it happens in reverse order of how things were accumulated, the newest thing you added on, or the last disease you see is healed first, and so it goes down to the deepest level of cause. The more one heals, the deeper levels one can heal, and as higher levels of vibration in body are needed to heal deeper aspects such as are buried in fetal imprinting, bone alignment and DNA inherited and ancestral aspects. One can't let go of oneself/clinging totally all at once; one has to slowly let go of all that previously defined oneself, bit by bit. Physiologically it's impossible, your nervous system can't transform that fast. The process will stop whenever one won't let go of a belief, and one can go into reverse awareness and reverse health, if one won't let one's body heal/transform. So if one is playing a mind game with oneself, a sure sign is that one's health is not improving, one's awareness is not rising. The body doesn't lie (one's realized aspect), but listening to what we tell ourselves, is certainly not to be trusted.

BeiYin: Given how one’s realization exists conceptually, this image can't fill the upcoming void. The disturbed individual tries all kind of techniques to gain back one's balance: Meditation, Sun gazing, yoga, Tai Chi, psychotherapy, prayer, etc. And in fact it helps: The rigid structure of personality is loosening up, is melting into new and unknown fields of being. Irrational influences find their way into the individual’s perception, like intuition and self-expression, which has as source something not existing in one’s personality.

Betsy: meditation can be done to try to gain something or not. If one is not done trying to gain for oneself, then all is used to keep one intact. But doing these kinds of things, it can certainly back-fire, so good... either way, when one gains insight into ways one is staying the same, then these are what allow one to take further steps, to not do that anymore and then be open to find out another way 'one is fooling oneself'. Confirmation one is on the right track eventually comes in a different form, beyond anything one can think of, it's direct and quite amazing.

BeiYin: Slowly the measurements of values are changing. What seemed to be important before is less significant and is not needed anymore to give satisfaction, because new more subtle possibilities are discovered.

Betsy: as we change our whole perspective changes, each time we change this happens and we slowly get used to a life where daily change becomes part of our reality. Living is then a joy, as one isn't clinging to judgments, problems and negativity, one is healthy, free from pain and resistance to what is, and enjoys life tremendously. I speak of a state of full healing, of which I am not there yet, but each day I see I am less reactive,happier and enjoy simple things more.

BeiYin: Before, there has never existed real 'openness' because the person had allowed only influences that gave self-confirmation and enriched one’s established self-image. But now there is an opening of the system and one is open to receive even unknown influences. The individual starts to be capable to observe one's reactions and is not that much identified with them, with this being able to discover where the reactions are coming from and what has caused them. This then gives them possibility to make decisions, recognizing that their old behavior is worn out and belonging to the history of their personality. At this point, the horizon of awareness widens and separating boundaries are melting away. One might have the first time experience that ‘real communication' is possible because there is less need to defend one's mental and emotional property.

Betsy: yes, but still it's a long process, and there will be much tears and pain along the way, to come to a point of experiencing this daily, thus also why so many quit doing it. People have their memories of times like this and feeling the exhilaration so it's like a beacon in the dark, to wonder how come they don't feel like that all the time or today? When they realize they are indeed dark rather than light most of the time, then they come back to doing what worked in the beginning to get results. Giving up habits is hard to do, and it takes many efforts to set new ones. But mostly people don't heal because they are pain avoidant. Pain itself is the sign that one is healing, and exactly that which people want to eliminate. To continue to heal one needs to accept pain and know it to be part of the healing process, then one is not resistant to change and can learn to not identify with ‘this feeling’ of healing as negative and thus create the ideal conditions for accelerated healing.

BeiYin: All this is due to the fact that 'personality' (the illusion of existence through being identified with one's reactions and one's properties), is fading away and is being transformed into a kind of existence, which is independent of one’s body, one's emotions and one's mind. Yes, this is in fact possible, and it’s not like before where being-ness only existed through concepts, dreams, images and ideas.

Betsy: one illusion is replaced with another illusion. While in body there is no existence independent of one's body, the two are one. When you look at a cat, you know its nature, the same as with a rock. Humans are no different, if one is aware one can see it in the face/body, and there are different levels of awareness in bodies. When you let go on clinging, energy is released, this energy rises your awareness rises, your body changes, as your body changes, your senses change, as your senses change, you can sense more/differently, your awareness rises, your perception changes.

Question: How can there exist something when I'm not able to experience it with my senses and being able to understand it using the capacity of my mind? Whatever there might exist, it doesn't exist for me as long as there is no proof.

Betsy: You don't need proof of some 'phantom' god-like image like this, as its illusion anyway; energy needs matter to transport itself. You will get direct proof by healing, by seeing your body heal, and by noticing your perceptive abilities expand/change, intuition will pick up, what you can sense will be more fine, etc.

BeiYin: Talking about all this doesn’t have much practical sense because whatever is said or written, will go into the pool of one’s concepts and knowing, or if it is unknown it will be rejected using one's arsenal of arguments. So what might be a creative way to point out the same in a way that can be more widely received?

Betsy: Written information gives possibilities or other horizons, so it can raise questions in the reader and make them wonder. Yet, we know that while identified with one’s thinking, then all concepts and ideas are collected as ‘more knowledge’, which serves to strengthen the existing state: being identified with mind and personality – or of one’s reactive self. With that said, I think the only way is for people to prove it to themselves, which needs action and a good way to measure the effect of their action. I would suggest people start by doing the meditation or healing method of one’s choice twice per day, as we know this is the main way that ‘steps in awareness’ have been achieved. , But it would be really helpful if we could measure changes to the system with scientific instruments, which would take the guess work or ‘fooling oneself aspect’ out of the equation. As it is there are many who have meditated daily for many years, and are still stuck in their identification with reactive aspects of themselves, so it should be a warning that even meditation can be used to give self-confirmation for oneself. It is amazing to see that today, many who have awakened are still stuck with being identified with their self-image, and mostly this is because they have adopted a grander spiritual image. Yet, there is a known fact, that as awareness goes up, one’s bodily vibration also goes up, as one becomes less dense as matter and grows towards an energy body with an expanded and finer nervous system. To keep people on track, a simple tool that could measure muscle charge or known brain wave patterns that indicate increased vibration, would be a great feedback tool to let people know their meditation is being done effectively and they are doing it right.

Can we prevent death, disease, and old age?

Can we prevent death, disease, and old age?
Comment: "We human beings have progressed a lot, we have come a long way from the stone age to the present, yet still we are to go a long way. Personally, I do not think that we have any chance of conquering the above three that is death, disease and old age."

I used to think that we couldn't, and then when something happened to me in the last two years, I started to think we could go beyond death, disease and old age.A brief history: I was meditating and working towards what might be known as 'enlightenment' for the last 15 years. Around 10 years ago I had a spiritual awakening, then after this there were steps I went through having to do with the intellect which each time would raise my awareness. Around menopause another step came that had to do with the way we respond with our emotional imprint laid down from infancy. Then after this I ramped up my work on meditation and a few years after that, there started a profound change in my physical body. Mostly this hasall been changes to the nervous system, or so I presume. I think it's a change to the nervous system, because I feel a tingly vibration in the muscles and often there are symptoms of tones in the ear and flashes of light in my head. The most interesting is that my whole skeleton is being realigned, with a kind of stretching that is done spontaneously.

When I was born I had a birth defect in the skull, which affected all the joints on the right side of my body: the TMJ, the shoulder, elbow, hip and knee. All of these joints would pop out of the joint and sort of dislocate. It seemed to just be a fluke all my life, didn't really bother me, I was athletic, etc. This is a congenital birth defect, and I can report this is nearly totally healed, my skeleton is almost straight -- still a bit left to go. This stretching that's been going on for the last two years, has loosened the sutures of the sacrum/hip and also the sutures of the bones in the cranium.

I know you won't believe this, but it's like my whole body is becoming elastic, as the fascia sheet covering all the body becomes pliable. It's like all the connections between every bone have been stretched in every direction, to remove all the cricks, tight ligaments, or restrictions of range of movement in every section of my body. The work I am doing is very much like going into a physical therapy or rehabilitation process. It's hard work, just like that to get a broken hip back to being normal. It takes time, to restore the body to the vitality of one's youth is not something that happens overnight. So far it's been three years for me doing these stretches. Many things in my body have been healed as this process goes on, I have no doubt that everything that was a problem will be totally fixed.

I don't get sick anymore, I feel more energetic each day, and my energy is soaring. One sense I get from this is that I am going in reverse, meaning I'm getting younger. Okay, it's not important for me that someone believes me that this goes on with me. Just I put this out there as a kind of precursor to tell those who truly are asking this question, that might very well be possible. I have been taking notes for each day of this amazing experience, and try to just record the facts, hoping that someday these notes are useful for others to determine what is the biological and physical reasons for this remaking of my body. From my observations I understand that in the human brain, there is the capability to self-reflect, and this is what we know as 'personality'. Yet, this structure is an intermediate step in our evolution as humans. When one meditates then what one is doing is basically withdrawing energy away from this structure, one becomes the observer of one's reflection. Each time one meditates, this structure is slowly broken down and as energy is released from ‘the store of personality’, this released energy is used to make a change in the brain (central nervous system). Eventually after enough changes are made to the CNS, it sets off a more profound change to the CNS, sort of like a domino effect.

Brain researchers are finding out today that the brain has a lot more plasticity, or ability to change itself, then we previously thought. I just saw a show and they said one could possibly live longer, just by stimulating our brains more. It's our conditioning: which is like learning something early and then just repeating that over and over all one's life, that creates ruts/tracks in the brain, which reduce plasticity and eventually cause problems such as disease in the body and aging of the brain, and then we see acquired disease, dementia, Alzheimer’s, etc. They already know this doesn't have to be. Yet, they think that to go beyond it, one way is to just learn new things, to push one's limits and go into unknown fields. This is okay, but I know there is a better way to increase brain plasticity and that is to break down the structure that is conditioning itself, and that is personality: all those learned habits and characteristics which we think are us. One will get the maximum brain plasticity, not by putting in another track or more tracks, but rather by taking out all the tracks.Well, I hope this stimulates somebody to think differently about the possibilities. We are only at the beginning to understand about the brain, aging and disease, yet I see science from all fields is coming closer to find out about the role 'personality' and how our life energy as soul is the main factor that limits our possibilities. Spirituality and science are coming closer together.

Betsy

Poem: What’s it like to be aware and how does it come about?

What's it like to be aware and how does it come about?

There is no internal chatter

thinking is totally silent

knowing is instant and direct.

There is no emotion

one’s body is totally relaxed

filled with blissful tingling.

Sound has no formed edges

rather you hear all at once

extending to far reaches of cosmos.

Sight has no delineation

ones sees interacting changing shapes

expanding into distant horizons.

Touch has no barriers

vibrations blend and bodies melt

the two are merged as one.

Ones life IS transformation

spontaneously adapting to the new

no resistance, no pain, no disease, no death.

One’s body no longer confines

one can travel to far spaces

and be everywhere at once.

Upon awakening “I think therefore I am.”

is replaced with “I AM when I don’t think.”

these are changed perspectives and neither is truth.

Believing you are awake ends your evolution.

You confirm your belief by ability to willfully

focus attention when desired – which is merely meditation.

Thousands of hours of meditation will be needed

which will slowly distinguish the mirror

transforming oneself into invisible being.

Then there will be no need to stand firm

focusing intently to manifest ones energy

into one’s vibrational concept of being.

Actually, while ‘being’ it’s not possible

to ‘stand firm and observe clouds’ as

when aware there are no clouds to observe.

One no longer seeks proof that one is aware

based on what one observes and how one reacts

when one is always one with one, the meditation is over.

Betsy

February 16, 2009 11:00 am

Poem: Question What you can See

Question what you can see.

Question what you can SEE
inside and outside of yourself.
Senses make the unseen tangible and visible.
Thought is visible consciousness
tracing the passage of your invisible self.

Asking ‘Who Am I?’ is a good start
The question makes you momentarily visible
but then one might wonder: “Who is it that’s asking?”
Reflecting is process of seeking the source,
and will continue until the seeker is found.

Consciousness and what is known
is always past-tense.
You are not inside of consciousness as
Nothing can contain you.
Fluid Spirit has no boundaries.

Moments of Being one with oneself
the universe opens in all directions
but limitless boundary can’t be sustained.
Coming back to ground and daily life
Continuing on with one’s daily meditation.

Ecstatic experience of bliss only happens
when one is completely quiet without a notion of self.
With regular practice, blissful moments lengthen
a new proof confirming that nothing is ever lost:
each time we surrender ‘our life’ - we are given ‘new life’.

Betsy
January 25, 2009

How to Go Beyond the 'Story-Telling' Habit

How to Go Beyond the ‘Story-Telling’ Habit

Comment: "An area of my ongoing 'work' is to watch my reactions to the happenings that come my way. There are never ending opportunities to be alert and especially so in relationships. To reduce unnecessary suffering to oneself and others, one must be aware of one's habit to add 'mental stories' to explain away what is happening. It seems so hard to stay close to the unfolding life, in the present moment. It seems there is an irritation with 'what is' happening, we want to fight it, and it arises because we want/expect things to be different! It seems the best we can do is to accept it ain't going to be how we want it, then to drop our story telling habit - and this is all one can do and needs to do to go beyond it."

It is a good ability to be able to see one's own story-telling mode when it arises - it takes a lot of awareness to see it, to know it's happening when it does and to recognize it. It takes even more awareness to be able to truly let it go and drop it because one has to be willing to not want to do it. I also agree with you that relationships provide such a fertile growing opportunity, and especially when there is conflict. I grew a lot from such a situation a few years ago. (I'm not saying you have conflict...)

I remember questioning the phenomena of 'story-mode' itself as a whole, I wrote a sequence of articles on it, Why these persistent internal dialogs? (These articles are on my website). What was interesting to me, is I knew this talking was nonsense and defensive as I could see that when I looked at the content, it was totally ridiculous stuff and often not very nice to myself or others.

Also I noticed that when it went on too long unchecked, then it would effect my emotional state, stress built up, I would get all wound up, likely would get sick and then was more likely to react at anything with all the force of the built up energy - with my ego. I saw it later as me allowing personality to activate - to get strong, and then after this would happen, there was nothing more to do, then do more meditations and wait until this state de-energized. Depending on how far I let it go on, it could take from 3 days to a week to de-energize. So I am sure you know all this too, having observed it.

For me I was doing the same, noticing it and setting it aside, and thinking it was enough if I just did this, yet doing this often it still wasn't changing, it was still happening - so persistent. I could even go to sleep at night after meditation and wake up in the morning, talking away. So curious how it was, like it had a wheel of it's own, driving all by itself. I felt I needed to know something else about it in a more general sense to be able to get a stronger control over it. Why did I still do this - get sucked in - even though I knew the harm it caused me and others when I did it, it all reduced to the question of:

"What benefit do 'I' get out of it by doing it?"

I realized that one does a habit or behaves in a way, because by doing so, one gets something out of it. To drop a habit, we have to know what we get out of it by doing it, and only then when we see that, will we be ready to make a clear decision to be able to drop being in that way. One adopts a habit at a point in one's life, because it was helpful for oneself at the time one adopted it. The habit we are talking about is one that has been with humans for a long, long, time, so also why it's so hard to change/transmute/drop.

To change any habit, one must see clear what benefit it gives you to do it. Once one sees the benefit one gets - one can only 'observe this' while/when it happens to receive this understanding, it can't be understood intellectually - then one will have a new 'self-knowledge' about one's conditioned habit/aspect in a general way - what we call an 'aha' or leap in understanding.

Once we have that piece of information, then our willingness to drop it will increase and as we practice doing that more, then also we start to spend progressively more time in quiet than in talking, and our perception and ability to be present will be enhanced along with our doing this. Our growing awareness will start to pick up significantly after that - as moments of quiet time increases...

Hint: One must be willing to enter into a totally unknown, still and quiet field of being. At first this is very scary, because one has never encountered it before or been like this before, so being unknown it will take much courage to enter into this darkness.

Betsy

Question about pain in lower back and sacrum

Question: "I am wondering how others have experienced, dealt with and resolved issues that have arisen with kundalini energies in the lower back and any pain and complications resulting from it. I have developed a very distinct knot of energy, tension and pain in my lower back surrounding my sacrum. I am aware of it even when I am sleeping, stretching has done little to ease or release this tension. The other thing that is remarkably helpful is when someone places their palm over the base of my spine, it's profoundly comforting, and actually triggers a change in consciousness for me. I'm contemplating massage and or reiki because of this - but am concerned and curious about other's experiences of this."

Answer:
I have experienced a knot of tension that you relate in sacrum area, and the way I resolved it was to do a standing meditation, then when meditative, to let go of my body and allow it to 'fold' or move by itself. This practice occurred to me early on, because I realized that 'being' was taking over. So then I decided to give an hour or two each day, to allow that to happen, trusting, that I could be moved like this. It started slow at first, not much movement, but as my nervous system changed, then each day it became more. So saying, eventually I was dropping into squat positions with a huge force of energy doing it, like it was melting into the muscles, flooding them with hot energy, which would then act to open the hips more and more each time. There was much pressure on the sacrum, and I have a congenital defect in the right hip, so for me it was very painful and hard to go through. What I can see happened 'with hindsight' is the fused bones of sacrum to hip girdle, unfused. This happened over many months of sessions. Then later the fused bones (or nearly fused bones) of all bones in my skull, unfused, with other kinds of spontaneous stretches. Later I concluded that the majority of energy of the transforming person, held as personality, is grown into and held in place by the bony structure that formed as one grew into adulthood. Thus to release this energy, the skeleton must separate again, and the places that are most important to be loosened are those bones, which directly attach to the central nervous system: skull bones, shoulder girdle, spine, sacrum, hip girdle. These stretches were never about trying to accomplish anything on my part, I just let my body go, and over time the transformation process happened. First thing was the hips were opened in various poses and stretches. Each time the tension would release and I would think, great, that's over, I would feel a huge release of energy coming out of the opened body part, and a big rush in freed energy, with all kinds of interesting symptoms. I would think great, that's behind me, but then in a little time, tension would build up again and I would have to start all over again. And so it goes on like this for many years, yet there is always progress, I become stretchy and elastic through all the bones of the body, including the vertebrae in neck, shoulder's and skull. So as I see it, it's a growing process, and one is opened a micron at a time, then the CNS changes, then it manifests physically as changed body posture. It's like the process is transforming old energy to new, and the old energy is held bent in lop-sided skeletal form, each time I am straighter, and also more energetic, the vibration rises each day.

I formed a word for it at the time, trying to explain it to myself. I called this bent loop of energy through the body, the cord of personality. When it first started it was like working in the hips for weeks on end, then it progressed later on to working in the shoulders for weeks. I thought, okay, it's nearly done, next is the skull and it's over. But then to my surprise it started all over again in the hips, then with less time, it moved up again to the shoulders. Then I thought, okay it needs 3 passes, like all things, which change. After the 3rd pass through, I was hoping it was done. No... It started over again. Then I noticed each time was less time between passes from tail up to skull. Today, it is one continuous movement of work, there is no gap and hardly ever separate work on body portions, the hips, shoulders, spine and skull bones all adjust in one long full-body spontaneous stretch. So this cord is like energy, it is the personality expressed in the way the body / personality has learned to be and develop, which by definition of personality is conditioned. So to be as being, one must transform this old conditioned energetic cord to a non-conditioned, free-flowing and balanced one, and this is not done by 'you' and figuring out how to do it or what you might need to do, but rather by 'YOU' as you allow it to happen. So the more you give/surrender and allow YOU to do what it needs to do, the less there is of ‘you’ and the more ‘you’ are ‘YOU”, so you change more the more you let go. It doesn't need your help, just your willingness to let go and be open to be guided.

Next you asked why’ laying on of hands’ on sacrum causes your consciousness to rise and tension is released. I think it's because when one gets more energy, it's actually easier, because the more energy you have the more awareness, it's like it encourages 'being to take over', then the change needed to be made, can only be done in this state. The tailbone/sacrum is the root of the spine, and it is where energy builds up, in a gyration fashion. So applying hands to this area (and also raising sexual energy, re: orgasm), causes energy to circle in pelvic bowl, thus it’s like building up a circular force, then this high energy is sent up the spine and energizes the whole nervous system. To make a change in any part of the system, there has to also be made a corresponding change in the skull/brain, and to change the brain/skull it needs a very high level of physical vibration to do it. So the body is one whole, like each microcosm of the body is a circle thru body and has a pathway through the brain for that body part. There are millions of these pathways. When energy rises in the Tailbone area, then it's sent up the spine, and this extra boost in energy is then enough to 'alter consciousness' (to make the voice go quiet), to change what is needed in the brain in that interval of quiet withdrawn energy, (to complete the circuit), then next a new instruction or signal of the change is sent back down into the body to make the physical change of the area that's in tension (being worked on to transform it). Okay, so this tension will resolve on it's own without you doing anything, probably when you go into deep sleep at night, when you surrender control of thinking. Yet, these periods of sleep are not that much time to do all that's needed to be done, so if one doesn't do more surrender sessions during the day, then I guess this process could go on much longer, and one might not be able to finish it even in a single life time.

In my kundalini awakening and transformation process I have used Reiki and acupressure nearly every day. The first time I used Reiki for self-healing I fell in love with it because it rose my energy so significantly, I knew that was what I needed – more energy. As I see it, it's not really reiki, which is the source of the strong energy, rather it's your own power that is this source. What generates so much energy is actually the 'laying on of hands' technique rather than the reiki symbols. I think that Reiki is simply a technique to entrain one's own resonance to a specific frequency, which is helpful to accelerate healing. No matter what technique you use, it's always your own energy signature or self that is doing the healing/change. Reiki is misunderstood this way; people think they are channeling extrernal energy. I don't see this is in fact true. When one puts one's own hands on oneself, it raises one's own energy/being; it’s like self-entrainment (this is another topic). Thus the possibility of being meditative or in quiet mind states increases as one's own energy rises, and the effectiveness of making transformative changes increases in that kind of setting.

Betsy

Advanced Steps of Awareness

A Message to All People who have realized authentic steps in Awareness:

[Skipping detail of previously realized steps of awareness.]

10. (arbitrary number) After having recognized one's essential self and having studied ones reactive self, unpeeling the layers of conditioning, and dropping concepts, beliefs, etc, from doing a regular meditation practice and studying various spiritual texts, and having conversations with other spiritual people. Then one comes to a place where one feels one knows all there is to know about it, and then one becomes a 'teacher' of what one has learned. it is often the case then that when one encounters another that one looks very near to see how the other is stuck, what concept might be impeding them, and then one responds back in a creative way to try to tell the other what they can't see in themselves. This is the step of becoming a teacher, one gets value from being it, thus one is identified with it. by being like this, then what happens is one is insulated from being able to look at oneself anymore. It's all about critiquing the other, seeing where others need help. The intention is good, to help others realize, yet the problem is the one doing it, stops growing because attention is now outward. Many people are happy with this realization level, because the rewards that come back with healing and teaching others gives it's own kind of confirmation. To go beyond this step, one must realize one is doing this, and then turn back to oneself and go back to basics, with the intention to further deconstruct the deconstructor (of others. This step is the glass ceiling that today, keeps so many spiritual people from reaching further steps.

11. The next realization comes, as one becomes acutely aware of one's internal dialog and judgments about all kinds of things. One starts to realize this voice is going on all the time, it rarely ever stops. Even after years of meditation, where one believed one was being quiet in mind, one starts to see that this wasn't so, it was only what one told oneself. One's awareness is increasing, so also one's ability to see the dialog, the internal noise, becomes greater. Being aware of the non-cessant chatter, then one starts to get more serious in one's ability to turn it off, in meditation and in daily life.

12. the next realization is that of the story-teller, of of what one is telling oneself is truth and one's tendency to believe what one tells oneself is truthful reality. One's own perspective, interpretation, or viewpoint is what one believes is truth. One starts to realize everyone is doing this, so the reality is that hardly anyone is really there and present. Everyone is in their own world, the world of the dreamer. when one sees one's own dream, how one's story telling affects oneself, and how one reacts to it as truth, then one is ready to drop it.

13. After realizing the story teller, then one realizes that everything one repeats to oneself - consciousness becoming visible as thought - what one can see, is only 'one's momentary take' or one's interpretation, all of which comes out of one's past, as a reaction to happenings. One sees clearly in this step why one can never know anything, what one knows is in fact, already passé and not truth. It's simply an individual reflection of the truth, one is coloring non-formed reality with one's personal interpretation. This is fine, it's best to know the reality, thus after this you are truly open to receive any kind of information from any individual or from life, which doesn't give you confirmation for those truths you are holding. You become ready and open to drop everything, to just let things pass through you and let them go.

14. After this step above, then you start to wonder anew, what is truth, where is truth then, if it's not here? As you ponder this, it will appear to you again what is truth as it did when you first awakened so many years ago. But this time will be different you will feel it strongly, as your essence arises up. At this time, then you will be done with seeking, you have found your answer, that which you were seeking and there is no point to study any more about it. It is time now to start realizing this truth physically in the world, beyond all concepts.

15. When you start to concentrate on truth and not concepts, then your meditation starts to become really effective. The amounts of time spend in no-mind increase dramatically. It is then that you become aware of the energetic aspects of your personality and how you use the environment to provoke to be able to energize your personality to be able to react. Before you might have understood this intellectually, as a concept, but were not able to see it first hand, as your energy and emotional body gets contorted into the shape of anger or fear, for instance. You start to see that you are pretending in a major way, with all your energy, you are pretending to be alive, because when your wallow in listening to your thoughts and believing in what you heard, then you generate strong emotions in the body, and the reason you do it, is because it gives you the feeling of being alive. I call this step seeing the tricks of the ghost.

16. After you have seen the pretending ghost, then you become even more focused on increasing your energy, to do more meditation, because even though you try to not energize your personality in the way you've seen, it is in fact very difficult to hold one's energy and not react how one has been hard-wired to do it all one's life. You discover that when you have higher awareness, it's easier to do. then you also discover that higher awareness comes from doing more meditation. So at this point, you know what you want to 'be', and to do it, you need to give up more of 'being the little you'. So you increase your meditation efforts from two hours per day to 6 or 10.

17. Sensitivity to energy increases. As you increase your meditation hours, you will be looking very closely at your meditation, because you can distinguish clear between being quiet and being in talking mode, you will start experimenting with various meditation tools, to see what actually works in your meditation to get the effect you want, which is simply total silence. During this period, your sensitivity in growing strongly and you will start to become very sensitive to other energies around you, because your own energy is growing. You will start to see auras, feel energy vortices, feel differences in energy in objects such as rocks and crystals. Your intuition will be increasing and your 3rd eye is opening.

18. As you continue in this way, when your energy is high enough (you have been successful to transform energy held in personality to that of free awareness then it will trigger by itself full kundalini activation, or the physical growing. There are latent DNA instructions in your body for the second growing, but it can't be triggered until there is enough energy to do it. This will result in a full healing and remaking of your entire body, like a reverse aging, as this work transforms the final remnants of personality energy held in your physical bones and body, to that of spontaneous form or free being.

[there are more steps after this, and I'm sure more for myself as well beyond where I'm at today. As a help for you realized ones, I let you know that you are most likely on the first step in this list.]

Betsy