What is Personality and How to Go Beyond it?

What is Personality and How can we go Beyond it?

Dialog with Betsy & BeiYin

BeiYin: What is personality? Is personality an illusion?

Betsy: personality is due to the organization of the current human brain/body, so it produces an inside reflected view or inner sensing of all that we encounter through our senses. We say its illusion because we come to find out that what is reflected inside, we identify with as ourselves, as 'me' and eventually come to find out that this reflection is not us, but rather due to internal mirroring neurons, or sensing capabilities of the brain. At this moment, then this structure of organization of our brains, has served its purpose, to encounter our true essence or the creator of the reflected image. At this point of self-knowledge then can come the breaking down and reorganization of this structure in the brain's nervous system - to eliminate the reflecting organization of the brain, but this rewiring only happens by a process of non-doing, with needs no intention by you, this non-doing is time spent in the state of meditation. The doing is done by making avail of the energy you were holding in 'static form of personality' (conditioned aspects) and transforming it into a new structure, which results in a healing or metamorphosis or reorganization of the mirror into direct sensing and response.

BeiYin: The tendency to survive is inbuilt for all animals. In humans, we see this instinct morphing in complexity, as one uses one’s mind to conjure up infinitely varied ways to defend one’s system.

Betsy: yes, the problem being humans are identified with the nervous system structure itself, which holds patterns of using energy in certain ways, with the old habit to try to survive and keep oneself intact. Thus one holds energy in certain forms, mostly due to beliefs, and finds other ways to do the same when old ways no longer work. The only way out of this game is to spend time in non-doing (deep meditation) with no concept. You will know if it's working, if you are doing non-doing right, if you are healing/changing in profound ways, which can't be pretended or imagined.

BeiYin: 'Personality' starts when consciousness is developed enough that the individual is self aware and this probably starts with the development of senses and their reflection caused by reactions of the system, then realized as body sensations, emotions and thoughts. In this phase there exists no observer separated from the observed, the consciousness exists only through reactions within the system and - there is a total identification with these reactions. Reactions are felt as "I" and out of this the individual gains one's feeling of existence, being limited to body sensations, emotions and thoughts - forming one's 'personality'.

Betsy: Good description of how it comes about. I would add that how one feels oneself as "I" is appropriate for that person’s state of evolution. So one feels as me whether one is identified with one's reflection of not, one is always 'me' having a journey and each day one is different - so that's the constant factor. What is missing here is that one's body organization limits what what can receive. So when one is sick, then one notices one's awareness is reduced and might then trip on a wire around a pallet. The lower one's awareness the less one can receive, and the harder it is to be meditative. The idea that one can access being while in body without being limited by the health of energy flows going through is false. One’s body reflects one's realization, as it is with all forms, energy=matter and matter= energy. People think they can miraculously heal without having to go through pain as the tissues change and to do something to get it done, that isuntil they actually go through the healing process, and then realize that body is part of their reality.

BeiYin: Being aware of one's existence is the beginning of consciousness in a 'higher life form', but of course this doesn't mean that evolution ends here. It is a beginning, although still primitive, like we are observing on planet Earth, where very few humans are capable to go beyond this basic step.

Betsy: Being aware of one's existence is probably the biggest trap that keeps humans from taking further steps in evolution. They think they've arrived, and there is nothing more to do. Many people have taken this basic step, but not too many go further that it. There are levels to one's ability to be aware in daily life. So one decides to be aware in a moment where one feels awareness is more necessary or prudent to do. Then one starts to meditate. The longer one stays like this' just being aware', and then one's bodily vibration rises. As long as one can hold like this, then the vibration will keep accelerating. The higher the vibration, the more one can see/receive and the more spontaneous/intuitive one can respond to whatever one needs to. Because one can do this at will, then one feels that one is aware, and why one gets confirmation and also why one doesn't feel a need to do more. Yet what one doesn’t know is that there are levels above one's current capability.

BeiYin: planet Earth is still in it's beginning of evolution of consciousness, there is no doubt when one looks at the reality of humanity: War, fighting all over the planet, growing of systems by swallowing others, many millions of humans are starving and suffering not even having the minimum means to survive, while others live in abundance on the costs of others. Then there are millions with 'incurable' diseases, because the established systems are purely materialistic, representing the still primitive state of consciousness. To say it clearly: 'Personality' is NOT something bad or negative, it is a step in evolution, although it seems that humanity is stuck on this step and has difficulties to progress, what could have as a result that humanity is destroying itself - many signs point to this.

Betsy: it all depends on how you want to look at it, is the cup 1/2 full or 1/2 empty? As an old form breaks down, then it starts to crack and weaken and one can see this as what's happening all over the planet from all sides, of environment, weather, people, resources, etc. I think the majority of people have big egos today, having accumulated enough energy in form through experiences. So saying, they are rigid and full of energy in static form which is what makes a big ego, thus they have sufficient energy 'stored' to fuel the transformation into being or wellness and the possibility that it is released in parts comes more near the worse it gets physically outside. So I see all as well, a part of nature and to be expected.

BeiYin: But as all systems have the inbuilt urge to survive, the same with the systems on a more complex level, so the planet Earth might defend itself, supported by the next higher system the 'Sun'.

Betsy: you are right the earth will react, but also I see it not so distinct. What I see are periods of repeating growing cycles on earth, as can be seen from evidence of previous ice ages. So when reaching the end of a cycle, then there is the highest evolutionary form, which is stressed to transform, which is human. The sun also as it ages is increasing it's frequency or pulse over time, so all forms are being subject to higher vibrations, which also serve to shake us up more and make us sick. We either go with the flow or resist, so the choice is ours in the end.

BeiYin: What happens when the human system gets stuck on the step of having build up one's 'personality' - even up to a highly sophisticated state?

Betsy: when one is stuck, then one won't survive, one will get sicker, until one is forced to look at it and recognize the reality, that one is not transforming, but rather holding onto keeping oneself as one sees oneself. There’s not much you can do about somebody being stuck in high sophistication, just let nature take it's course. When they get sick enough, then that's the opportunity for them to take a closer look, if they can't do that then they will have to wait to the next lifetime and have another round of experiences. All is good.

BeiYin: Then the inbuilt tendency shows up and this is the longing and urge to overcome limitations and boundaries. If this need in one's growing process is suppressed by the other tendency of the system to hold oneself together, then the stuck system is cracked up by happenings from the outside and/or from the inside like disease on one or more levels: Body, emotions and mind. If these are treated with chemicals, then there can't be any 'healing' (which is a natural part of the evolutionary growing process), but by treating only the material aspects the system stays stuck and can only be 'cracked' by its death.

Betsy: right, I think I said that above in other words. I see the disease itself as part of the healing process, so all treatments that we try to do to 'heal ourselves' interfere with the higher wisdom of the bodies way to heal itself. To distinguish states in body of health versus being sick is hard to define, I see all as one process. Sickness / symptoms are signs of healing and should not be interfered with. So to not interfere is as simple as being meditative as much as possible, trusting this is enough and allowing one's healer 'time' to do what is necessary. Yet, simply doing a non-doing for humans to heal themselves is nearly an impossible request. If they've advanced far enough then they want to take credit for having healed themselves, and do all kinds of treatments, supplements, exercises, etc. then when they get a result, they say: I did it, all is vanity for humans. Probably all the treatments were unnecessary, just for confirmation, and the actual healing if it happened was due to having spent enough time spend in meditation, nothing more. Okay, all treatments if better than one's normal operating state will rise one's energy, so they can all help 'our healer' do it's job. But the most effective way to rise one's energy is simply to do effective meditation

BeiYin: In one's individual growing process there might come the moment when the 'personality' has grown to such an extent that all gained and collected properties don’t give satisfaction anymore. After turning around oneself again and again, the question might arise, what is the sense of all this? Also it might happen, that wishes and desires are not being fulfilled because of daily reality and then frustration is accumulating up to the moment when emotional reactions are causing disease: Depression, stress and distortion.

Betsy: then one realizes that one is doing all these things, and one still feels lousy, one is not getting better doing things in the way one is used to doing them. At that moment one simply gives up trying and when one does, one goes quiet, and it is s just this 'surrender' that starts or restarts the healing process. For example, cancer can be a wake up call, to ‘give up’; when one's physical life is truly threatened.

BeiYin: The strong 'personality' is shattered and comes near to collapse. But as there were many different concepts integrated in one’s personality, so also those of 'spirituality' with images of worlds beyond daily reality. This will be the moment when the individual needs those concepts to survive and it might serve and help for some more time.

Betsy: Energy held in form as personality is very complex and has many layers built up over many lifetimes. One can't release it all at once, it is released bit by bit, and each time a bit is released it's converted into a small part of new nervous system. Thus it's a biological process and happens as metamorphosis' the old energy taken from previously being held in form, being used to build the new form. Releasing of personality also echoes the healing process, it happens in reverse order of how things were accumulated, the newest thing you added on, or the last disease you see is healed first, and so it goes down to the deepest level of cause. The more one heals, the deeper levels one can heal, and as higher levels of vibration in body are needed to heal deeper aspects such as are buried in fetal imprinting, bone alignment and DNA inherited and ancestral aspects. One can't let go of oneself/clinging totally all at once; one has to slowly let go of all that previously defined oneself, bit by bit. Physiologically it's impossible, your nervous system can't transform that fast. The process will stop whenever one won't let go of a belief, and one can go into reverse awareness and reverse health, if one won't let one's body heal/transform. So if one is playing a mind game with oneself, a sure sign is that one's health is not improving, one's awareness is not rising. The body doesn't lie (one's realized aspect), but listening to what we tell ourselves, is certainly not to be trusted.

BeiYin: Given how one’s realization exists conceptually, this image can't fill the upcoming void. The disturbed individual tries all kind of techniques to gain back one's balance: Meditation, Sun gazing, yoga, Tai Chi, psychotherapy, prayer, etc. And in fact it helps: The rigid structure of personality is loosening up, is melting into new and unknown fields of being. Irrational influences find their way into the individual’s perception, like intuition and self-expression, which has as source something not existing in one’s personality.

Betsy: meditation can be done to try to gain something or not. If one is not done trying to gain for oneself, then all is used to keep one intact. But doing these kinds of things, it can certainly back-fire, so good... either way, when one gains insight into ways one is staying the same, then these are what allow one to take further steps, to not do that anymore and then be open to find out another way 'one is fooling oneself'. Confirmation one is on the right track eventually comes in a different form, beyond anything one can think of, it's direct and quite amazing.

BeiYin: Slowly the measurements of values are changing. What seemed to be important before is less significant and is not needed anymore to give satisfaction, because new more subtle possibilities are discovered.

Betsy: as we change our whole perspective changes, each time we change this happens and we slowly get used to a life where daily change becomes part of our reality. Living is then a joy, as one isn't clinging to judgments, problems and negativity, one is healthy, free from pain and resistance to what is, and enjoys life tremendously. I speak of a state of full healing, of which I am not there yet, but each day I see I am less reactive,happier and enjoy simple things more.

BeiYin: Before, there has never existed real 'openness' because the person had allowed only influences that gave self-confirmation and enriched one’s established self-image. But now there is an opening of the system and one is open to receive even unknown influences. The individual starts to be capable to observe one's reactions and is not that much identified with them, with this being able to discover where the reactions are coming from and what has caused them. This then gives them possibility to make decisions, recognizing that their old behavior is worn out and belonging to the history of their personality. At this point, the horizon of awareness widens and separating boundaries are melting away. One might have the first time experience that ‘real communication' is possible because there is less need to defend one's mental and emotional property.

Betsy: yes, but still it's a long process, and there will be much tears and pain along the way, to come to a point of experiencing this daily, thus also why so many quit doing it. People have their memories of times like this and feeling the exhilaration so it's like a beacon in the dark, to wonder how come they don't feel like that all the time or today? When they realize they are indeed dark rather than light most of the time, then they come back to doing what worked in the beginning to get results. Giving up habits is hard to do, and it takes many efforts to set new ones. But mostly people don't heal because they are pain avoidant. Pain itself is the sign that one is healing, and exactly that which people want to eliminate. To continue to heal one needs to accept pain and know it to be part of the healing process, then one is not resistant to change and can learn to not identify with ‘this feeling’ of healing as negative and thus create the ideal conditions for accelerated healing.

BeiYin: All this is due to the fact that 'personality' (the illusion of existence through being identified with one's reactions and one's properties), is fading away and is being transformed into a kind of existence, which is independent of one’s body, one's emotions and one's mind. Yes, this is in fact possible, and it’s not like before where being-ness only existed through concepts, dreams, images and ideas.

Betsy: one illusion is replaced with another illusion. While in body there is no existence independent of one's body, the two are one. When you look at a cat, you know its nature, the same as with a rock. Humans are no different, if one is aware one can see it in the face/body, and there are different levels of awareness in bodies. When you let go on clinging, energy is released, this energy rises your awareness rises, your body changes, as your body changes, your senses change, as your senses change, you can sense more/differently, your awareness rises, your perception changes.

Question: How can there exist something when I'm not able to experience it with my senses and being able to understand it using the capacity of my mind? Whatever there might exist, it doesn't exist for me as long as there is no proof.

Betsy: You don't need proof of some 'phantom' god-like image like this, as its illusion anyway; energy needs matter to transport itself. You will get direct proof by healing, by seeing your body heal, and by noticing your perceptive abilities expand/change, intuition will pick up, what you can sense will be more fine, etc.

BeiYin: Talking about all this doesn’t have much practical sense because whatever is said or written, will go into the pool of one’s concepts and knowing, or if it is unknown it will be rejected using one's arsenal of arguments. So what might be a creative way to point out the same in a way that can be more widely received?

Betsy: Written information gives possibilities or other horizons, so it can raise questions in the reader and make them wonder. Yet, we know that while identified with one’s thinking, then all concepts and ideas are collected as ‘more knowledge’, which serves to strengthen the existing state: being identified with mind and personality – or of one’s reactive self. With that said, I think the only way is for people to prove it to themselves, which needs action and a good way to measure the effect of their action. I would suggest people start by doing the meditation or healing method of one’s choice twice per day, as we know this is the main way that ‘steps in awareness’ have been achieved. , But it would be really helpful if we could measure changes to the system with scientific instruments, which would take the guess work or ‘fooling oneself aspect’ out of the equation. As it is there are many who have meditated daily for many years, and are still stuck in their identification with reactive aspects of themselves, so it should be a warning that even meditation can be used to give self-confirmation for oneself. It is amazing to see that today, many who have awakened are still stuck with being identified with their self-image, and mostly this is because they have adopted a grander spiritual image. Yet, there is a known fact, that as awareness goes up, one’s bodily vibration also goes up, as one becomes less dense as matter and grows towards an energy body with an expanded and finer nervous system. To keep people on track, a simple tool that could measure muscle charge or known brain wave patterns that indicate increased vibration, would be a great feedback tool to let people know their meditation is being done effectively and they are doing it right.

Kriyas are like a Baby’s First Steps; they are the Symptom of YOU coming alive.

Anonymous: “Right after a Kundalini workshop I had cleansing kriyas everyday which were very intense and it taught me a lot. I always started with specific exercises which were recommended and initially it started with snake like motions, when I was able to surrender to that, there followed the yoga poses.”

Betsy: As I see kriyas, there are transforming energy held in body as personality, the movement itself is happening by awareness, and happens when one has withdrawn energy from reacting as the mind/emotions. The movement is stretching that area of the body, to open that area, which holds an element of conditioned aspects of the personality – which one is holding one’s energy there as that. So kriyas as I see them, is the process of physical transformation, and they start out sporadic and over time increase, the time between them getting less and less until one's whole life is 'kriya' or as spontaneous movement - meaning one now moves as fully aware, not needing the mind.

Anonymous: “The best tip I had, was the tip that during meditation you DON'T have to sit STILL, to do so just blocks the flow, and that the silence will come automatically once the clearings are done and the energy can move freely.”

Betsy: That's a good tip, and good wisdom there at the end. I would just add that clearing is the process, so not to see it as 'done' or as a goal or one time thing. I think too many think of some people having blocks, more or less than others, and then kriyas only happen to remove blocks. I see the whole structure of personality as being one's current state of being, reflected as the body and it is loaded with millions of blocks. As one clears the blocks, one reclaims and transforms one's energy, it's a process, and one’s kriya movements will increase as one’s energy rises.

Anonymous: “At a later stage came 'having fun, dancing, dry orgasms and even spontaneous singing. Then I had an encounter with another being and after they left I cried; soon there followed the more heavy, mental, parts of the clearing, which still goes on.”

Betsy: There are all kinds of experiences in this process, and many like you say. For sure it's a highly sexual process and that is a big part of it. Laughing happens and crying, and unloading one's concepts and belief system - the mental aspect as you say. There is also the emotional component and then the more physical component, which is what I was referring to previously. Then there is the individual perspective, and how one experiences the whole process, which makes ‘everyone’s’ experience seem so different, not allowing us to see the commonalities within it as a ‘biological process’.

Anonymous: I heard from other teachers that kriyas are shaped by your own cultural references and experiences. So if your references are Indian dance, yoga and tai-chi that's whatyou'll get […]

Betsy: I haven't seen this, but obviously I don't agree. If it's shaped by cultural preferences, then it's happening via mind constructs or conditioning - one's movement is being channeled with thought, not pure non-mind movement. So it also makes sense to me that people think this, because they are still mostly identified with their personality when it starts, and can't discern beyond this conclusion. People can agree or disagree with me, it's not important to me and I won't go into an argument about it. For me, it's obvious that the kriyas are working to separate the spinal column bones, cranial bones and all joints connected to it: hip girdle, shoulder girdle and tmj and occipital ridge/atlas, to break apart the foundation or keystone of personality which is energy held most deeply in the formation of the skeleton during one’s growing. It’s a biological process and I have discerned the pattern of the movements and the purpose for them, because I have been through much of this process.

Anonymous: […] or if you're an Eskimo you'll get something that relates to you and doesn't scare you. Kundalini Energy is loving and doesn't want to scare you. It'll have you clear your body in a way that feels natural and familiar too you, if you don't resist it.

Betsy: Kundalini Energy doesn't have such attributes, it has no attributes, as pure energy it's unconditioned. Seeing it as loving, or as painful or as wanting to scare or not scare, these are 'judgments' or attitudes of personality, and are individual perspectives. The one that gets scared is one's essential energy (as the kundalini force), being identified with thoughts and emotions (reactions) and attaching to that. When one drops one’s own clinging to reactive thought coming out of one’s past, then it is the case that one is not resisting, and then there is no fear nor any other kind of judgment.

Anonymous: I don’t take the time anymore to let kriyas happen, but when I give a massage and the energy is good, kriyas automatically happen. I tend to end up in either Krishna or Shiva-like poses sending energy, or manipulating the person's energy grid, but I have no clue to what is actually happening.

Betsy: When your energy rises, as when you get any good energetic treatment like massage, then this is the condition to help your 'being arise', and at the same time let go of being as the personality (mind/reaction). It’s like a quick rise in energy being input into your system, and it will shock you out of identifying with your mind/personality and then healing starts in that interval - thus the kriyas happen with you. Treatments are good in most modalities, because they temporarily rise your energy flows and this is the right condition in which it is easier to shock you out of the old mode of being – behaving in conditioned ways as being identified with the personality – so you now can ‘let go’ of all that. So you see, even this doesn't need your doing. It’s like yourself just takes over when it can, when you give yourself what you need: more energy.

Anonymous: As always I still doubt myself that I’m not unconsciously pushing it in some direction that my ego likes to see.

Betsy: It's much better to have uncertainty and doubt, and to express that honestly, as that creates space for receiving, answers and growth. Thanks for your comments.

Crying is Healing

Where does deep emotional pain come from?

While we were growing in the womb, we were pretty much protected from the changing world outside us, mostly all of our needs were taken care of and we were pretty comfortable. From the time of our birth onward, then we are assaulted with the realities of the world, of unconscious people and start to experience things which hurt us. As an infant we are having experiences and the way we perceive these then, is nearly all as feelings, as our cognitive level and mind has not yet been developed. These early experiences are then laid down as our first teachings and are felt at a deep level and form an imprint which becomes the base of our growing personality. Later we will develop the cognitive or intellectual aspects of our personality, which are laid down on top of the feeling imprint, from about age 4 on up to adulthood when we stop growing. The feeling imprint which was laid down as an infant will have an influence on the mental defensive strategies that are laid down later. All parts effect the others. Then there is the growing phase itself, which happens from conception up until the last wisdom teeth erupt, which covers the physical attributes of our body itself. When growing stops, then it is that the personality is fully formed. After the end of growing, then it is most often the case that personalities are enlarged, but this is another topic….

As we Grow Up we experience Pain

So it is that as we grow up and our personality develops, it will happen to all of us that we have experiences which felt hurtful to us, which can be intellectual pain, emotional pain or physical pain from bodily injury. When we have a hurtful experience, then our survival instinct kicks in and then what we do is try to find ‘a strategy’ to avoid being hurt again. We are by instinct ‘pain avoidant’, so we are not aware we are building a defensive strategy at the time we do it, it pretty much happens at a subconscious level. If our sense of intellect was hurt, then we might change our intellectual pattern, denying to think in the way that hurt us and changing it to something else. If we were hurt emotionally, then we might try to forget or deny those things which caused us pain, perhaps by burying memories or by choosing not to express one’s feelings in an open way again. If we were physically hurt, then we have a tendency to mentally protect that area of the body, by not allowing as much range of movement in it, or by favoring the opposite side. So you might remember limping on a sore foot to protect it, long after the injury was healed. So then as we grow up, we go through different phases of development and depending upon what is our individual perception of our experiences, we will each lay down a unique defense strategy for all aspects of our personality. While we are growing up, for most people we are not aware of the defense system we are building up, this is mostly subconscious and stays in the background level.

Defense systems protect, but eventually they will have to be rebuilt.

The negative side effect of this process, is that it ends up that we don’t let the energy move through our body for self-expression in totality for our physical, intellectual and emotional aspects. What we are doing is channeling or directing energy flows in the body artificially with our mind, emotions and body postures, for the now forgotten reason we needed before ‘to protect ourselves’. In effect, this creates dark spots or unused areas in our body, mind and feelings – where we don’t let energy flow or in converse we create overused areas, repeating things which seem safe to us in body, mind and feeling. If we don’t use an area, then it happens that energy stops flowing through it and this can be a spot where disease in he body starts. if we overuse an area, then it happens that this area ‘gets worn out’, it’s like creating a rut, and in both cases it happens that the energy flows in the body of the adult are no longer free, flowing and balanced in all aspects of oneself. Compare this to how one’s energy was flowing as an infant, totally open with no defense system in place. Over time as this goes on unchecked, imbalances in the body will amplify, eventually resulting in mental, emotional and/or physical health issues.

Breakdown of the Defense Systems of the Personality

The defensive system of the personality has it’s benefits, the first being that it can help a child living around unconscious adults survive, and the second being that it is an intermediate structure which is collecting energy as accumulated experiences and is a stepping stone to reach further steps in our awareness. When the defense system of the personality has grown so large and is using nearly all one’s free energy to defend oneself in various ways, then it is that one has arrived to the point where the armor of defense has become excessive and is now threatening and detrimental to one’s survival to continue to hang onto it. If there are too many restrictions of energy flow, then it will start to harm the organism itself, because there is not enough free energy left over to be used for maintaining a healthy system. This is actually a natural progression of the growth of personality over lifetimes, so individuals will reach this point of ‘excess’ at different ages depending upon their past experiences and all that has come before. At the point it is reached, then it will happen that energy which was used to build up this defensive structure will now start to release. As energy is released from the structure, it will open up more of those ‘blocked’ areas of the body which were prior being used to defend oneself. The newest layers of defense are taken down first, and it proceeds as it goes into older and deeper layers. The older the defense system, the deeper, the more strong it is and the less one is aware about it’s existence. When one reaches the point of ‘enough is enough’ and experiences more pain than pleasure with one’s personality, then this is a turning point where one will start to ‘give up’ and let it go. This can also be seen as the point of starting to dissolve the structure of personality and when ‘awareness’ or ‘spirituality’ begins.

Being unaware of thoughts & feelings (the defensive nature of personality) is what builds up stress

Another thing many of us are doing unconsciously is that we are not aware of our thoughts and feelings at a deep level, we can’t see within clearly and we are not sure what we think and what we are feeling, we are little aware of what is happening in our internal space. So it happens that one’s thinking goes on in autopilot mode, constant chattering in the background with mental arguments and with repeated trains of thoughts. This kind of ‘story telling’ has it’s affects and will generate emotional energy in the body according to the nature of the thoughts. This is how the motor nervous system works, the thinking channel is directly connected to the motor neuron system which connects nerve and muscles cells together allowing for us to be able to ‘voluntary move’ our body the way we choose to with thoughts. Emotion (different than instinctual feelings, because they are based on what we think) is an energy charge built up in the muscles to be used to express oneself in a particular way. If we are not aware of this process, then it happens that stress builds up in the muscles of the body because we are not monitoring our thoughts, then also it’s often the case we are not aware of how our body feels or what we feel either, and so it is that not being aware of ‘how we work’, it happens that emotional charges build up in the body, causing ‘stress’ or held tension.

How is stress released from the body?

The only way to remove the stress charge already built up in muscles is to stretch the muscles and to learn not to accumulate it in the first place. This unchecked stress is like an internal tension, creating an internal pressure, which can’t be contained forever. Just like a volcano that is filling with gas, the pressure is building and as it does this strong force is pushing against that which is containing the pressure (the walls of the volcano itself). From this continuous tension, a crack will eventually form and when it does the pressure inside will release and along with it, there is an explosion as the huge force is released. So stress is released ‘cataclysmically’ in an intense way when it is held at bay for too long. So one should be aware of the laws of nature, that eventually the container will wear out, and especially so when subject to extreme forces. In the case of humans the shell here is the ‘defensive system of the personality’, and so when a crack appears in this structure, it will happen that some of this pent up pressure will be released. The amount released depends upon how large of a hole in the defense system was ‘let go of’ and how much internal pressure was built up.

Periods of Prolonged Crying (Crying Jags) are huge Healing events

So it can sometimes happen when healing that a ton of bottled up thoughts and feelings will come rushing out, and into ‘conscious awareness’, which can be painful while going through it. The more crying, the more emotoinal pain and hurting you feel, then you can know the more pent up energy you are releasing. After big openings in one’s personal defensive armor, it is not uncommon that one can cry every day for up to 3 weeks straight. This is totally normal, this is healing, and should not be suppressed, crying is the vehicle the body and system uses to clear out and release old held emotional energy. So if you are going thorugh this, know it is healing and after it is done you will feel much better. Let the tears of crying wash away the pain of the past and allow you to reclaim your essential energy.

Betsy

What is Meditation & What are the Benefits?

Meditation is Great for Releasing Stress

I have a friend who has been meditating for 50 years, and he now calls meditation -> "Stress Release Exercise". So you see, the practice of meditation reduces and relieves stress, rather than builds it up. Meditation is basically the practice of resting your thinking, You can try it for free, and make your own decision if it helps or not. The best is you do it each day, twice a day, for around 30 minutes each time and do it for at least 3 weeks straight to be able to see a result. Then if you decide you get a benefit, then you can make it part of your daily life, just like you brush your teeth every day. It's much like that, a preventative mental, physical and emotional health routine which you do every day.

How to Do Meditation

To do it, find a quiet place free of distractions, then get comfortable and close your eyes, the most important is your body is relaxed, not so much that you try to keep a certain body posture like many recommend. Then just put your attention on FEELING your breath move in and out of your body, which can be anywhere along the path of the breath. Re, you can notice the feeling of air coming in and out of your nose or into your lungs, or into your diaphragm. The important thing is you just are feeling the breathing happen, you don't have to breath in any certain way. Breathing happens all by itself, you don't have to 'do breathing' or think about breathing, you have nothing to do here except FEEL your breath move in and out. As you practice this, you will notice that you lose contact with the attention you had on feeling your breathing, what has happened is the thinking has started up. Don't worry about the thoughts or what the content of them are, just make a mental note - I was thinking - then refocus on feeling the breathing. If you try to examine your thoughts, then it will trigger more thinking and before you know it you will be only thinking. So for meditation time, it's good to have a reminder: this is not the time that I need to think. I can think later if I need too... This interruption of thinking happening and losing contact with simple feeling of breath will repeat over and over, this is totally normal. As you proceed in meditation practice it will become easier to feel the breath, and become more aware of when thinking has become predominant.

Why does Meditation reduce Stress?

The reason this practice reduces stress is because stress is caused by thinking. It's like you think all these things - re: all you have to do, and you don't have time to do it, then there's a conflict, the muscles hold tension and you have stress. Thinking goes a lot faster then what you can physically do, so the more you think things should be different than what they are, which is most of the time with thoughts, then the more stress you build up. As you learn to become more aware of thinking and breathing from continued daily practice of meditation, as you get better at tuning into what happening inside you, you will start to learn more about your basic make-up, personality, awareness and body and how all of you works. This is known as 'self-knowledge', which will allow you to take steps in your awareness levels. Eventually you get better at accepting what is happening 'right now' and learning to respond to it as needed, versus spending so much time thinking you can do more than is truly possible. So you see, if you continue you will stop building up stress in the first place, you will be able to catch that over active thinking pattern when it happens and be able to 'set it aside' and simply breath - even during the day - thus you become more in control of everything that you experience.

It's a very important life skill to learn how to control the reactions of thinking and emotions and physical actions. All that a human can do, the first thing that always happens is thought, this precedes all else, so becoming aware of thinking is paramount to have true will power and focus and control of yourself. When one's thinking is overactive, usually certain thoughts are repeating or a certain nature, which create an emotional energy in the body according to the underlying nature or tone of the thoughts. Thinking is part of the nervous system and is what allows us to act, so just prior to a movement in body, energy is built up in the appropriate muscles as an electric charge to allow us that movement. So think, emotion, then act. When one is thinking, one is building emotional energy in the muscles, if one doesn't act upon that which is set up, then this is 'stress'. Basically charges are in the muscles, but it is not released through action. By learning to only think when needed - when one needs to take an action, then one becomes more energy efficient, not building up unnecessary energy in the body when it's not needed.

Betsy

Is it true that "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger"?

Answer:

"What doesn't kill you", refers to facing a challenge that is beyond your comfort zone. So to go through an experience which is hard and sometimes painful. The reason why is it is hard or painful is because you are being forced to change. Resistance to change is where your pain comes from. The more one resists adapting to changing circumstances, the more pain one experiences. Pain is actually the symptom of the heat of transformation, or adaptation, of something changing in your system, whether this is physical, emotional or intellectual, all are aspects of who you are and is represented by 'personality'. So pain is good, because it means you are healing, or changing some aspect of who you are. When you go through something hard like this, then after you are finished with it, you have let go of something old and now have something new. This is why it is good, because now you are more updated, refreshed and new in some way that you weren't before. You are better able to survive the more you allow the old ways or things to go, and adapt to what is new. The universe and world is constantly changing, every micro second, the more you learn to face what is here now and respond to it,, the more you also will become like the universe, spiritual, flowing and adaptive. That's our challenge, to learn how to welcome change and be one with it.

Betsy