Saturday, October 18, 2008

Question about pain in lower back and sacrum

Question: "I am wondering how others have experienced, dealt with and resolved issues that have arisen with kundalini energies in the lower back and any pain and complications resulting from it. I have developed a very distinct knot of energy, tension and pain in my lower back surrounding my sacrum. I am aware of it even when I am sleeping, stretching has done little to ease or release this tension. The other thing that is remarkably helpful is when someone places their palm over the base of my spine, it's profoundly comforting, and actually triggers a change in consciousness for me. I'm contemplating massage and or reiki because of this - but am concerned and curious about other's experiences of this."

Answer:
I have experienced a knot of tension that you relate in sacrum area, and the way I resolved it was to do a standing meditation, then when meditative, to let go of my body and allow it to 'fold' or move by itself. This practice occurred to me early on, because I realized that 'being' was taking over. So then I decided to give an hour or two each day, to allow that to happen, trusting, that I could be moved like this. It started slow at first, not much movement, but as my nervous system changed, then each day it became more. So saying, eventually I was dropping into squat positions with a huge force of energy doing it, like it was melting into the muscles, flooding them with hot energy, which would then act to open the hips more and more each time. There was much pressure on the sacrum, and I have a congenital defect in the right hip, so for me it was very painful and hard to go through. What I can see happened 'with hindsight' is the fused bones of sacrum to hip girdle, unfused. This happened over many months of sessions. Then later the fused bones (or nearly fused bones) of all bones in my skull, unfused, with other kinds of spontaneous stretches. Later I concluded that the majority of energy of the transforming person, held as personality, is grown into and held in place by the bony structure that formed as one grew into adulthood. Thus to release this energy, the skeleton must separate again, and the places that are most important to be loosened are those bones, which directly attach to the central nervous system: skull bones, shoulder girdle, spine, sacrum, hip girdle. These stretches were never about trying to accomplish anything on my part, I just let my body go, and over time the transformation process happened. First thing was the hips were opened in various poses and stretches. Each time the tension would release and I would think, great, that's over, I would feel a huge release of energy coming out of the opened body part, and a big rush in freed energy, with all kinds of interesting symptoms. I would think great, that's behind me, but then in a little time, tension would build up again and I would have to start all over again. And so it goes on like this for many years, yet there is always progress, I become stretchy and elastic through all the bones of the body, including the vertebrae in neck, shoulder's and skull. So as I see it, it's a growing process, and one is opened a micron at a time, then the CNS changes, then it manifests physically as changed body posture. It's like the process is transforming old energy to new, and the old energy is held bent in lop-sided skeletal form, each time I am straighter, and also more energetic, the vibration rises each day.

I formed a word for it at the time, trying to explain it to myself. I called this bent loop of energy through the body, the cord of personality. When it first started it was like working in the hips for weeks on end, then it progressed later on to working in the shoulders for weeks. I thought, okay, it's nearly done, next is the skull and it's over. But then to my surprise it started all over again in the hips, then with less time, it moved up again to the shoulders. Then I thought, okay it needs 3 passes, like all things, which change. After the 3rd pass through, I was hoping it was done. No... It started over again. Then I noticed each time was less time between passes from tail up to skull. Today, it is one continuous movement of work, there is no gap and hardly ever separate work on body portions, the hips, shoulders, spine and skull bones all adjust in one long full-body spontaneous stretch. So this cord is like energy, it is the personality expressed in the way the body / personality has learned to be and develop, which by definition of personality is conditioned. So to be as being, one must transform this old conditioned energetic cord to a non-conditioned, free-flowing and balanced one, and this is not done by 'you' and figuring out how to do it or what you might need to do, but rather by 'YOU' as you allow it to happen. So the more you give/surrender and allow YOU to do what it needs to do, the less there is of ‘you’ and the more ‘you’ are ‘YOU”, so you change more the more you let go. It doesn't need your help, just your willingness to let go and be open to be guided.

Next you asked why’ laying on of hands’ on sacrum causes your consciousness to rise and tension is released. I think it's because when one gets more energy, it's actually easier, because the more energy you have the more awareness, it's like it encourages 'being to take over', then the change needed to be made, can only be done in this state. The tailbone/sacrum is the root of the spine, and it is where energy builds up, in a gyration fashion. So applying hands to this area (and also raising sexual energy, re: orgasm), causes energy to circle in pelvic bowl, thus it’s like building up a circular force, then this high energy is sent up the spine and energizes the whole nervous system. To make a change in any part of the system, there has to also be made a corresponding change in the skull/brain, and to change the brain/skull it needs a very high level of physical vibration to do it. So the body is one whole, like each microcosm of the body is a circle thru body and has a pathway through the brain for that body part. There are millions of these pathways. When energy rises in the Tailbone area, then it's sent up the spine, and this extra boost in energy is then enough to 'alter consciousness' (to make the voice go quiet), to change what is needed in the brain in that interval of quiet withdrawn energy, (to complete the circuit), then next a new instruction or signal of the change is sent back down into the body to make the physical change of the area that's in tension (being worked on to transform it). Okay, so this tension will resolve on it's own without you doing anything, probably when you go into deep sleep at night, when you surrender control of thinking. Yet, these periods of sleep are not that much time to do all that's needed to be done, so if one doesn't do more surrender sessions during the day, then I guess this process could go on much longer, and one might not be able to finish it even in a single life time.

In my kundalini awakening and transformation process I have used Reiki and acupressure nearly every day. The first time I used Reiki for self-healing I fell in love with it because it rose my energy so significantly, I knew that was what I needed – more energy. As I see it, it's not really reiki, which is the source of the strong energy, rather it's your own power that is this source. What generates so much energy is actually the 'laying on of hands' technique rather than the reiki symbols. I think that Reiki is simply a technique to entrain one's own resonance to a specific frequency, which is helpful to accelerate healing. No matter what technique you use, it's always your own energy signature or self that is doing the healing/change. Reiki is misunderstood this way; people think they are channeling extrernal energy. I don't see this is in fact true. When one puts one's own hands on oneself, it raises one's own energy/being; it’s like self-entrainment (this is another topic). Thus the possibility of being meditative or in quiet mind states increases as one's own energy rises, and the effectiveness of making transformative changes increases in that kind of setting.

Betsy

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Advanced Steps of Awareness

A Message to All People who have realized authentic steps in Awareness:

[Skipping detail of previously realized steps of awareness.]

10. (arbitrary number) After having recognized one's essential self and having studied ones reactive self, unpeeling the layers of conditioning, and dropping concepts, beliefs, etc, from doing a regular meditation practice and studying various spiritual texts, and having conversations with other spiritual people. Then one comes to a place where one feels one knows all there is to know about it, and then one becomes a 'teacher' of what one has learned. it is often the case then that when one encounters another that one looks very near to see how the other is stuck, what concept might be impeding them, and then one responds back in a creative way to try to tell the other what they can't see in themselves. This is the step of becoming a teacher, one gets value from being it, thus one is identified with it. by being like this, then what happens is one is insulated from being able to look at oneself anymore. It's all about critiquing the other, seeing where others need help. The intention is good, to help others realize, yet the problem is the one doing it, stops growing because attention is now outward. Many people are happy with this realization level, because the rewards that come back with healing and teaching others gives it's own kind of confirmation. To go beyond this step, one must realize one is doing this, and then turn back to oneself and go back to basics, with the intention to further deconstruct the deconstructor (of others. This step is the glass ceiling that today, keeps so many spiritual people from reaching further steps.

11. The next realization comes, as one becomes acutely aware of one's internal dialog and judgments about all kinds of things. One starts to realize this voice is going on all the time, it rarely ever stops. Even after years of meditation, where one believed one was being quiet in mind, one starts to see that this wasn't so, it was only what one told oneself. One's awareness is increasing, so also one's ability to see the dialog, the internal noise, becomes greater. Being aware of the non-cessant chatter, then one starts to get more serious in one's ability to turn it off, in meditation and in daily life.

12. the next realization is that of the story-teller, of of what one is telling oneself is truth and one's tendency to believe what one tells oneself is truthful reality. One's own perspective, interpretation, or viewpoint is what one believes is truth. One starts to realize everyone is doing this, so the reality is that hardly anyone is really there and present. Everyone is in their own world, the world of the dreamer. when one sees one's own dream, how one's story telling affects oneself, and how one reacts to it as truth, then one is ready to drop it.

13. After realizing the story teller, then one realizes that everything one repeats to oneself - consciousness becoming visible as thought - what one can see, is only 'one's momentary take' or one's interpretation, all of which comes out of one's past, as a reaction to happenings. One sees clearly in this step why one can never know anything, what one knows is in fact, already passé and not truth. It's simply an individual reflection of the truth, one is coloring non-formed reality with one's personal interpretation. This is fine, it's best to know the reality, thus after this you are truly open to receive any kind of information from any individual or from life, which doesn't give you confirmation for those truths you are holding. You become ready and open to drop everything, to just let things pass through you and let them go.

14. After this step above, then you start to wonder anew, what is truth, where is truth then, if it's not here? As you ponder this, it will appear to you again what is truth as it did when you first awakened so many years ago. But this time will be different you will feel it strongly, as your essence arises up. At this time, then you will be done with seeking, you have found your answer, that which you were seeking and there is no point to study any more about it. It is time now to start realizing this truth physically in the world, beyond all concepts.

15. When you start to concentrate on truth and not concepts, then your meditation starts to become really effective. The amounts of time spend in no-mind increase dramatically. It is then that you become aware of the energetic aspects of your personality and how you use the environment to provoke to be able to energize your personality to be able to react. Before you might have understood this intellectually, as a concept, but were not able to see it first hand, as your energy and emotional body gets contorted into the shape of anger or fear, for instance. You start to see that you are pretending in a major way, with all your energy, you are pretending to be alive, because when your wallow in listening to your thoughts and believing in what you heard, then you generate strong emotions in the body, and the reason you do it, is because it gives you the feeling of being alive. I call this step seeing the tricks of the ghost.

16. After you have seen the pretending ghost, then you become even more focused on increasing your energy, to do more meditation, because even though you try to not energize your personality in the way you've seen, it is in fact very difficult to hold one's energy and not react how one has been hard-wired to do it all one's life. You discover that when you have higher awareness, it's easier to do. then you also discover that higher awareness comes from doing more meditation. So at this point, you know what you want to 'be', and to do it, you need to give up more of 'being the little you'. So you increase your meditation efforts from two hours per day to 6 or 10.

17. Sensitivity to energy increases. As you increase your meditation hours, you will be looking very closely at your meditation, because you can distinguish clear between being quiet and being in talking mode, you will start experimenting with various meditation tools, to see what actually works in your meditation to get the effect you want, which is simply total silence. During this period, your sensitivity in growing strongly and you will start to become very sensitive to other energies around you, because your own energy is growing. You will start to see auras, feel energy vortices, feel differences in energy in objects such as rocks and crystals. Your intuition will be increasing and your 3rd eye is opening.

18. As you continue in this way, when your energy is high enough (you have been successful to transform energy held in personality to that of free awareness then it will trigger by itself full kundalini activation, or the physical growing. There are latent DNA instructions in your body for the second growing, but it can't be triggered until there is enough energy to do it. This will result in a full healing and remaking of your entire body, like a reverse aging, as this work transforms the final remnants of personality energy held in your physical bones and body, to that of spontaneous form or free being.

[there are more steps after this, and I'm sure more for myself as well beyond where I'm at today. As a help for you realized ones, I let you know that you are most likely on the first step in this list.]

Betsy